March 18, 2004

The Therapist: A Frightening Beast

Last week I talked about chemical support. The week before that I went on about friends and personal support. Today I'd like to address professional support for both the partner and the sufferer of SZ.

It is a frequently unfortunate fact that we are all human. We each have a unique combination of needs and hang-ups. This is what makes mental illness, and especially SZ, so difficult to a) cope with and b) treat. And this is why it is very important to find the right doctor to suit the sufferer's and the partner's particular needs.

So how to do this?

First, let's deal with the SZ sufferer's therapist. The partner of an SZ sufferer is a vital component in treatment. Not all psychiatrists understand this. Therefore it is important to make sure that you at least visit a new therapist together for a couple of sessions. Also make sure that the therapist includes you and recognizes your importance in the scheme of treatment.

If the therapist makes you or your partner unhappy in any way, try talking about it. If the problem cannot be fixed, you need to find someone that can work with the both of you in a positive way.

Secondly, if you feel that you need professional help as a partner, also find somebody who is going to be positive about your choice to be with an SZ sufferer. A therapist who criticizes your life choices, or tries to change them, will only make you negative.

Before seeing a new therapist then, draw up requirements and questions that you have. And again, talk if you have a problem with how the therapist handles you, or find someone new if the problem seems to remain.

In general positive and negative attitudes from others tend to influence SZ sufferers and their partners more strongly than others. It is therefore tragic that therapists who should know better often make the problem worse by their attitude.

So, whether in a social or professional setting, make sure that you as far as possible surround yourself with people who are positive towards both your partner and you. You need to feel that professionals working with you care about both of you and your feelings.

We all need acceptance. Not everybody will be understanding. When you find someone who is, keep that person in your life at all costs.

Posted by cathi at March 18, 2004 09:37 AM | TrackBack

Comments

My husband has sz.His therapist makes him
upset by talking to me instead of him(like i am his mother).But he is on medicade and we can't afford to go to someone else.

Posted by: Mandy at March 19, 2004 08:00 PM

Cathi, could you please contact me?
Thanks a lot!

Corinne

Posted by: Corinne at March 22, 2004 03:59 PM

Mandy,

I truly sympathize with your problem. My husband and I are with a state institution and we pretty much have to deal with what we get. Neither of us like the doctor we have now, and they change dr's every three years.

What I wanted to say with this blog was that you should try to do all you can to make sure that you and your husband have a good experience with your dr. Is it possible for you to address your issue with your dr.?

If nothing can be done, try to let your husband know that you respect him and that the dr.'s attitude is not your own.

I know how hard it can be! Good dr.'s are few and far between, especially in psychiatry. Most of the good ones also charge a whole bankful of money for their goodness. We can only do so much; but on the other hand we have to realize that there are things we can do to make things better, even if the situation seems to suck.

Good luck!
Cathi

Posted by: Cathi at March 23, 2004 06:15 AM

Corinne,

You can contact me by clicking on my name. I can't find your email.

Cathi

Posted by: Cathi at March 23, 2004 06:16 AM

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