A World Torn Apart

Received July 2005

Janey's room was hallway lit from the hallway light in front of her room. She felt a little nervous sitting there thinking about how things had been going in her life. What would happen next, she thought. She was 16 and life was supposed to be just beginning for her. When she could no longer stay awake and feel asleep all of her nightmares began to start again. She felt she was falling asleep and maybe 10 minutes later someone gave her some kind of drug and waken her up. The people who had waken her told her many things and asked alot of questions that she didn’t know about and had never heard of. They would tell her prophecies and tell here to uncodee things. She would get out of bed the next day and hope that it all had been a dream, until the prophecies started happening she denied that this was really happening. They told her to figure out everything she could that they wouldn’t explain it. Finally she seen one of their Jackets it was black leather and it had cross bones and a skull on it with the name Vacrance written on it in white paint. 

This made her even more nervous why was these people doing this, and what was she supposed to know about she couldn't figure it out she'd done nothing wrong - what was going on? she wondered.

Then Janie’s personality started to decline; she was afraid to talk a lot; she even became afraid to tell anybody what was happening for fear that these people would do more than what they had been doing. Janie stopped eating because fear ran down her spine and made her stomach upset. The next night and every time she slept the Vacrance would come sometimes ask questions they wanted to know her life story then would ridicule her while she would talk about it they told her how stupid she was.

Then one day  Jane’s Dad and Mom took her to see well-known in these parts a doctor because of her decline in personality he put her on some medication and had her to see a counselor. The medication didn’t help as these people started not only ridiculing and asking questions they started raping her they called rape being abold. . After several trips to see the doc and Jane’s personality declining more the doc sent her to a hospital several towns away about 100 miles in fact. The Doctor at the hospital thought that Jane was unruly and didn’t prescribe any meds and put her in school at the hospital. She stayed there around 3 months then the doc decided to let her go home.

By this time Janey was even more afraid than she was before. The people in the black jackets had emphasized that Janey should never tell what was happening or that they would make matters worse! They called her an eleepal. Then Janey so stressed out knew that people would probably get tired of her because that doctor was saying that nothing was wrong with her that she was unruly it bothered her badly but she knew that she couldn’t tell them what was wrong for their safety, she usually kept her mouth shut! Sometimes she would give people clues to what was going on she would write a few words on a piece of paper teen burn it afraid of being bugged or that someone would get hurt she didn’t explain what exactly was going on.   Janie heard music when no one else could this upset her but she wouldn’t show it. She or none of her family had ever heard of Schizophrenia so they had no clue to why she was being the way she was and she had no idea that it all could be in her mind.

After about a year to a year and a half the Vacrance told her that they no longer had use for her  that she wasn’t as smart as they had thought that she was they said that they would ease up on her a little. By this time she had been hospitalized 3 or 4 times one of these times she started eating again because she was told she would die if she didn’t.

Then her Mom and Dad put her in the hospital again the Doc finally figured out what was wrong and finally she was diagnosed with schizophrenia. What a wonderful day what if all of that stuff Janie had went thru wasn’t real maybe no one else would ever be hurt by that awful thing called the Vacrance.  As the Vacrance had said they eased up on Jane only bothering her once in a while they said now that she was diagnosed that they could leave her alone and because of her diagnosis no one would believe her anyways. Every once in a while but hardly ever they still let her know that they was around.  

Now at age 29 Janey is going to College again, this time working on an associate degree in Human Resources, She has a boyfriend a good family life. She has a life and loves it. She gives credit to Jesus for making things easier to cope with because that is who she prayed to a lot about these events. And without her mom and dad a couple of real friends and a dedicated doctor who really cares she don't know if she would have made it. She still has her ups and her downs like most people. She now takes little medication she hopes that everybody will learn about schizophrenia not the stereotypes but the true illness. No one in her family has been diagnosed with this illness besides her of course.



   Copyright 1996-2004. All Rights Reserved.