May 12, 2004


It has been a while since I've written anything here, and alas I cannot write much of any interest tonight. I merely want to explain that I have been subject to an overwhelming fatigue, sleepiness, and general exhaustion that go beyond even the fatigue etc that is normal for me. I want to write about so many things, but find myself so wearied by the mere thought of picking up either the laptop or a pen, that I give up and go back to bed, where I find I cannot sleep despite my sleepiness, except in fragments of two or three hours, even when I've been awake already for too long.

In desperation, I have ordered some CDs from the Monroe Institute, which my doctor recommended as being shown by research to have validity in their claim that their tapes and recordings actually beneficially alter brainwaves. Anyhow, I ordered one for achieving delta sleep, which I desperately need, and one for helping concentration, and a very popular one, called "Surf" which is no more than the sounds of waves crashing on a beach accompanied by the cries of seagulls and other seashore sounds. This one, which she lent me a copy of until I have my own, has already proved beneficial in banishing the voices while I play it, yet not interfering with my ability to read or pay attention to whatever I am concentrating on. So I ordered that as well.

I hope these measures make a discernable difference, and that my extreme fatigue abates. Meanwhile, I cannot promise another entry soon, though I hope it will be somewhat sooner than later. In any event, here endeth my blog entry, whatever number it may be.

Posted by pamwagg at May 12, 2004 04:47 AM | TrackBack


I am no stranger to the fatigue of which Pam writes. It is such a feeling of overwhelming inertia that one is helpless to fight it. It creeps into every cell until it owns you, and you MUST sleep. The sleep itself is like actually being unconscious. No dreams brighten or darken your inner landscape. Your mind is a blank canvas upon which no artist has begun to paint. When you awaken, you are not refreshed. You're just as tired as you were before. Help.

Posted by: Paula Kirkpatrick at May 19, 2004 12:26 PM

Thank you for writing. Reading your account is helping me to understand what it might be like for my son. I love my son very much and I feel helpless. Thank you. I hope you are feeling better soon.

Posted by: Janet at May 13, 2004 02:43 AM

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