September 03, 2005
I'm sorry for my absence but things have been crazy around here. We did a reading that was supposed to be for around 30 people and turned out to be for 320 people! and it was, by all accounts a great success. We've done radio shows and TV and...Well, due to the hurricane Good Morning America has bumped us probably into next week, but hopefully then. And CNN is doing a segment on us on the Paula Zahn show for which they taped us all day last Wednesday and thoroughly exhausted me...In fact, I'm still recovering. No voices, but I do have certain thoughts recurring that I shouldn't be thinking, about the Five People and Grey Crinkled Paper and how Evil I am...Things that never went away, true but were pushed back far into the background until now. I'm also not eating well at all which means my stamina is even more limited, but somehow I can't get myself to eat enough to give me more energy, and of course that makes me somewhat lethargic, on top of the medications' effects. I dunno, this media book tour is already taking a toll on me, no matter how good it feels to have TV and radio shows want us and to have good reviews from everyone. I've always hidden from the world physically, and now I'm totally on display which makes me very uncomfortable. What to do? What to do?
Posted by pamwagg at September 3, 2005 08:01 PM
Recently I wrote to you personally on just this subject. I was amazed at your energy and stamina and told you that I knew I would not be able to handle all the promotional work that publishers demand of their authors.
Above all, hear this. Your book is an accomplishment achieved by very few. NOTHING, however, is worth risking the return of the pain and horror that you appear to have conquered until now. If the pressure of revealing your very private self to the world, combined with your neglecting yourself nutritionally, physically and emotionally are beginning to send you down that road no steps but yours have trodden black, then take a break NOW. If necessary, do only those things that are the least stressful for you, or if necessary(forgive me Lynnie) just stop all activities entirely. As you said and I agreed, you wrote a book. Period. Been there. Done that. Whatever you do, don't let the real Pamela who has emerged gingerly, once again hide behind her disguise. We all love you too much to lose you again.
T'amie de la coeur, Paula
Posted by: Paula Kirkpatrick at September 4, 2005 01:02 AM
Well done pam! U have been going strong till now. If possible take out some time to be alone, and then carry on with further recordings. I'm sure u'll be fine. take care. love. puzli
Posted by: puzli at September 4, 2005 12:42 AM
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