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I'm anxiously awaiting my appointment with my dr. on the 30st. They cancelled my other appointment without asking me; so I've been waiting since mid May. I need a mood stablilizer. I'm so moody and hostile. I think my wellbutrin is causing me to have seizures at night so I'm going to ask to go off of it. I want to try Abilify again. Last time I tried it I was naseous; but I need something that works. When a drug is recalled does that mean that it is being removed from the market or does it sometimes mean that the drug will now carry a warning? I'm confused because I heard that a group of psychotropics were being recalled.
I asked Kaiser (my HMO through work) if I could have therapy and they denied me. So I wonder, if they could deny someone like me therapy then who gets therapy? They are more concerned with saving money than saving lives.
Work seemed great, but lately it has become a drag. They didn't train me and now they are upset that according to them I have not been fulfilling all my job requirements. This caused a huge scandal to wave through the office. These are the same employers who allowed my predecessor to do street drugs while on duty and allowed him to avoid fulfilling any of his job duties for a couple of years. They don't tell me how to boost membership in my clubs, but they complain that numbers are low. I feel defeated. I wonder why I put up with the stress and strife when I only make $250 more per month than I would get if I weren't working. This is really discouraging. I really don't know what other job I can do. I feel stuck.
I have decided that when I get the money I will finish my B.A. online. Perhaps I will have less courses to take if I transfer to Thomas Edison.
I am going to a photo shoot with a modeling agency on the 31st. I hope I can do this properly. I'm really nervous. They're having this audition for a show on NBC where these women share a house and have life coaches to help them work on their core issues. I kind of want to do it; but I'm thinking they might kick me out for being strange. Or maybe they wouldn't pick me because they don't want someone who has so many issues. Maybe I'd be too paranoid being so exposed. Wouldn't it be cool if I get my picture somewhere and I could say ha ha you all said I couldn't make it. How you like me now?Posted by Butterfly Emerging at July 24, 2004 01:49 AM | TrackBack