|Home | About | Donate/Volunteer | Contact | Jobs| Early Schizophrenia Screening Test||
I am just getting ready to go to the corner store to buy my partner some pop and myself some coffee creamer and get some cash for coffees at work today. I worked yesterday alright and attended my lecture last night and stayed up but napped a little. I will work today and then attend another lecture tonight then finally really sleep. I hope to go in one hour early today to work on the computers at work and apply for a different job at work but can only do this on computers at work not from my home computer.
I am worried about being appropriate. Whenever I am around compliments and fame I seem arrogant. But I am it seems working well with other students and am developing a few friendships this term, which I did not have last term. I am also emailing with other students and this has not really happened much to me in the past. If this continues things could be very positive this term at school.
I hope some people find this blog useful. I enjoy writing it almost everyday. It started in 2004 on February 20th that year. So this blog will soon be three years old.
I have the same pair of pants on today as I had on yesterday. I need to shave a little but not much for work today. I am working until 3:00 PM. We have a union meeting after work today. Then I have a class tonight.
I woke up early this morning and did a little reading of library books. I am just about to take my morning dose of vitamins.
I am fairly excited coming home from a stimulating math lecture. I was a bit rude to one student trying to talk to me as I left given that I was already talking to one of the smarter students about information theory. I came home and bought Pepsi. R came by and had coffee with my partner and he picked up more of the encyclopedia set. There are only 8 more volumes to go to his apartment.
I am not sure yet how I will use Windows Vista. Our school allowed me to download a legal copy of Vista business edition. I am just burning my disk before work now. I needed to dowwnload it on a virtual PC on my macintosh then network that PC with my laptop then was able to start to burn the disk. I don't actually have a PC at the moment only a virtual PC. I will of course be paying for Mac OS X 10.5 as well soon and that might only be installed on my Macbook not my eMac. I might then be able to install Vista on my Macbook. I need to start deleting more files on both my Macs.
I am up early today and ready to go to work now. I have class after work. R may come by tonight to take home more of the encyclopedia set. Most of the stuff coming out of my office is now out. A few more items still need to be moved. I did move my printer and my stereo off the old desk and the old desk is ready to be moved. I did not move it yesterday because I was tired and worried about having an accident in that state of mind. When the old desk is out I can clean up more papers and then continue to build the new shelves.
I just sent an email to confirm our blog meeting this week where I will coach some consumers and professionals on using blogs. My hope is this supports the peer to peer support project. After all that is what I have been hired to do.
I sent an email explaining the 12 bar blues to a young bassist today. I also made a myspace account for a band. This band is R, my partner and myself. I also am listening to some American folk music today. I have also listened to some Leonard Cohen this morning and will put on some Lynn Miles after the folk. I am also considering buying concert tickets for my partner and all three of R, C and J so we can attend a large CD release party at our cities oldest concert hall next Saturday night.
I stayed up all night Friday and did internet stuff. I also did some research Saturday morning using the web interface to the school's library. I then went to school and borrowed books. I came home and slept.
Today I will start a mathematics assignment. I will also read more about economics and game theory.
Our government disability support has still not closed our file even though I am making a normal full time salary and covered for medications at work. So they sent us some money and a drug card for medications next month. I must say that is fairly enlightened and much needed.
We played Cyberpunk 22.214.171.124 after a two year break. We used my miniatures garage parking landscape and miniature cyberpunk models. We are playing the Eurotour adventure. Of course we also talked consumer shop talk. I reminded C and J about remaining confidential when they told me the last name of another consumer. J claimed that this consumer in question does standup consumer comedy so it would not matter. And after all who am I to lecture on consumer issues. But they did learn her name in the general context of a self help group but then again they told me in a private home.
I was late one hour this morning to work. I worked the full week otherwise. I tried some new tasks at work this week. I was productive all week. I have a union meeting for this job next Tuesday.
I went a little crazy and manic with spending with my new wages this past fall. I bought a new HDTV and a DVD player for this TV. I recently bought a DVD recorder and am making DVD's of my law BA studies lectures which are on VHS. I am using local classifieds successfully in getting rid of extra stuff which is part of our mess around here. The original DVD player that produces an HDTV signal is being sold today. I am only loosing 20$ on the sale from the original price because I bought it on sale. The new DVD recorder also produces an HDTV signal so I actually had an extra DVD player. While I don't think I am brave enough to be an ebay seller I can sell locally fairly well so far.
I am also giving a way an older TV we no longer need. One of my radical union comrades is moving into his own aprtartment. So he needs apartment stuff and I am helping him out. He is also a graduate student at my new school.
While writing this entry I sold the DVD player. So we have more grocery money now for tomorrow.
I woke up at 5:30 this morning a little later than I wanted. Tomorrow I will try to wake up at 5:30 but I have a lecture until 10:00 PM tonight. I won't get home until at least 10:30 PM. I worked very hard today coming in a little early and staying right till 3:00 PM. I may be late tomorrow but I have some sick time my boss will let me use if this happens.
I slept at 8:00 PM last night. My wife and I went to sleep at the same time and that felt good. I slept a good 7 hours and woke up now at 4:00 AM. I read a little studies and checked my bank account. I am now getting ready to shave and shower before work. I will also take some vitamins. I have a class tonight and will sleep soon after 8:00 PM.
Another student in one of my classes needed help with statistics so he paid me today to help him. I am home now and trying to get to sleep early for my regular job tomorrow.
Again I can't go into much detail but I did manage my first all nighter at work without coming home early. I was also worried enough that I tried something different in my tasks and managed to improve my production levels. I was not as tired as I could have been. I woke up on Wednesday 9:00 AM and worked that day and then attended a lecture that night and then stayed up studying and computing and then worked a full 8 hours Thursday. I came home and chatted with other student's in Second Life for half an hour or forty minutes then slept by 5:00 PM Thursday. So about a thirty hour day. I then slept until 4:30 Friday morning. So slept a good 11 hours. I worked on Friday and again used my new task technique and worked as hard as other workers and made my production levels. So a risk taken and something gained out of it ( the better production levels) besides what I was expecting which was just not to be late for work Thursday morning. I went into work on both Thursday and Friday half an hour early. I am now left feeling proud of my work for my weekend.
In the end my partner disagreed we should take out cat to the vet so she wouldn't take her. So I was glad to save the money. I also listened to my wife's opinion on the matter. My wife knows more about animals than I do. My mother-in-law is a professional with animals and my wife has learned from her mother. In fact, our cat is fine now. Last weekend C thought the cat was just hungry and lacked energy. I was over reacting thinking I had broken her leg because we had crashed in the door way to the kitchen. But our cat is fine now. She never was in pain or meowing except for the actual crash two weeks ago now,
Our usual Friday night get together happened. R did not make it. He was sleeping. My new work hours allow me to have Friday's again for social time. I am now back dating this post as I am still up from Friday. Tonight when C and J got here I let them watch TV and they watched Desperate Housewife's and I worked on my computer in the office for about 20 minutes. I also ordered pizza and paid for it. We then watched 20/20 about debiting. I took away from 20/20 a few rules of thumb, like monthly savings should be half one's age equal to the precent saved of one's monthly income. I am short about 400$ of this goal per month. Thus I have a debiting problem.
I loaned C a copy of Here Comes the Sun a book on how to cope with depression. I told her to donate it to the self help group when she is done reading it. Last week I gave her a copy of the St. John's First Aid manual. I am trained in first aid and level C CPR myself. I have been recertified this year. I had an extra copy of the manual which is why I could give C a copy.
I attended my lecture last night and we learned some advanced stuff using basic maths. I came home and tried to sleep. I took my meds at 8:00 PM and lay down by 9:20 PM with my wife. We talked a little and held hands. I could not sleep having woke up yesterday at 9:00 AM. I decided today would be the first day in my new work shift that I would try staying up all night so I would not be late. I also needed some quiet time to read.
I did read over night and got my economics course material organised and did some thinking on the readings. I then played a little Second Life and will play again today after work. Playing after work will be my last task today and it will be in regards some educational work in Second Life. For the past hour I did paid web mastering so I am also caught up on that work. I was to attend a meeting of the peer support project today but it was rescheduled. So after work today I am free to sleep until work on Friday and I don't have to play Second Life it is only an option.
I am just getting ready for work now and am dressed in my work clothes. This means black slacks, warm plaid shirt, clean organic cotton socks, clean underwear. I will now shave and have a coffee and then do some private journalling before I go into work early today.
I have caught up on reading in economics. I am just home from work now and getting email and having a meal before going to school. I will be sure to sleep tonight by 9:00 PM. I have niacin again and went a few days without niacin this past weekend.
I had a lecture until 10:00 PM last night. I got to sleep by 11:30 PM. I woke up after 9:00 AM. I got into work and had to book my late time as sick time. Later in the day my contract was extended. I am home from work now. I worked about 4.5 hours today.
I attended an interesting math class last night. I need to do more reading for school. I don't have any tests until the end of February in both courses. I do have some assignments in the math course but these haven't been assigned yet. I am still asking a lot of questions in class. Tonight's lecture will cover more about Nash equilibrium points and I have done some of the pre class reading.
I have a bit of a cold this morning and am just getting to leave for work early. If the cold and sniffels get worse I will need to book off sick.
I woke up at about 4:45 on time for work. I just checked my school email. I will take some vitamins and get some coffee now. I have been drinking less coffee lately although I can now buy coffee at work because I am on the day shift and the cafeteria is open in the day time.
I am up on time for work. I used my meds yesterday to force my sleep early. I did sleep at 2:00 AM on Sunday morning and then slept 9 hours to 11:00 AM. On Saturday I slept at 10:00 AM after being up all night on Friday. But I only slept to 3:00 PM on Saturday. I then went to sleep last night at about 9:00 PM. But I am now up on time for work. I can relax and get in early. I need to shave now but have already started to dress for work.
I am doing some computer back up tasks this morning. I did not help M with her computer this weekend. I did sell some things using classifieds on the internet and may sell some more things today. We will have a Vet bill today. Our medications should also come today. I also need to buy some vitamins today. I will do this after work today.
I am going to sleep now. My partner is taking our cat to the vet tomorrow. Our cat has something wrong with her leg but it is not broken or anything. She is not in pain but she is clumsy. I am working at 7:00 AM hopefully I can post something in the morning before work.
For the time from about summer 1984 to September 2006 my medications have been paid for by the provincial government. There really are no free medication programs in Canada except if one is poor. I have benefited from these free income based drug plans for all this time. Now my workplace health plan will take over. We will run out of our three month's medications supply next week. I was not really ready for this and needed to borrow from my father to pay the up front medication costs. I may have the meds delivered this morning but I am tired and will have to get the cash out of the bank. It might be better to wait until Monday actually. But the money is ready and the presciption has been filled. I am not sure what I will do but if I am up when the pharmacy opens I may go for doing this today. I could use a credit card and that might solve the problem of having to go outside in this tired state and having to take delivery myself rather than my partner taking delivery.
I just called the pharmacy and the medications will be processed this weekend and delivered to my partner on Monday.
I am just about inspired to do some writing of blog policies for our peer to peer blog. I have a meeting after work on Thursday this week with the peer to peer support project personal to discuss thier blogs. I am going to write some policy to help them and some guidlines for blogging in the context of consumer/survivor blogs.
I did some reading and some school blog work these past 8 hours.
I was late for work today. I did not feel good at work today and people noticed. I worked my full day. I decided not to work tomorrow's overtime.
I had someone come by our apartment interested in buying a cell phone from me. He didn't buy it because it was with the wrong carrier. I have also got someone to take the two older office desks now and a futon. But she will come by when the large office desk is ready to move and she wants to move everything at once. I plan to place the old super computer shelves my friend made for me in the storage closet at the end of the hall. I may buy a work bench for the office but need to think about this a little first.
I took my medication 6 mg of risperadol at 6:30 PM. This is three and a half hours after work. I just ordered some take out Greek food and will try to sleep after this food arrives and we eat. I have been reading web stuff and writing for blogs since gettting home. I also called M about her computer. I may help her tomorrow. I also talked to C and R on the phone and asked that they come over on Saturday evening rather than Friday night because I need to sleep early Friday as I am working overtime on Saturday. If my medications don't make me sleepy I will stay up all night and work tomorrow and read over night. In fact, there are now 11.5 hours until I have to be at work in the morning. There are about 10 hours until I need to wake up for work if I sleep tonight.
I slept at 12:30 and was thinking of staying up all night. I was studying late last night. Instead I lay down and set my alarm. I woke up at 5:50 AM. I am rushing now to prepare for work. I am dressed but still need to shave. I am at least well rested and should enjoy work today. Class went well last night.
I needed some time to sleep today. I was up to 10:30 PM because of my lecture last night. But I also then needed to unwind a bit. I called my work last night and booked today off as a vacation day. I need to pay some rent, and pick up a package at the post office. I also need to return a book to school. I also need to do some reading. Then I have another lecture in the late afternoon/early evening today.
I had been invited to attend a systems integration in mental health services workshop later this month but I don't think I can get the time off work to attend.
I haven't been late for work in five or six years now. This was a first and expected. But really I stayed up too late last night. I attended my first class and then came home. I worked today and worked an extra hour to make up for being late. I also have a lecture tonight in 1 hour and a half. I will leave for the lecture in half an hour.
I worked again today and worked an extra half hour the past four days thus bringing my time back on balance. I had owed two hours for a union meeting. I am finding time to wake up and time to use the computer.
I won't have to actually fix any computers today. I will save M's old data on her Win95 desktop box and take these files and copy them to the Thinkpad I am selling her and also burn them to CD using the thinkpad. I have zip drives ready to make the file transfer between the machines. I also have some adapters and of course a computer tools set with screw drivers. The other task is to set her up with an email address and account at a community non-profit intenet service provider. I have some telephone RJ 11 ended cable for this and my own account to connect and sign her up on-line.
Strange that I should be studying John Nash's theories again. But this is what I am doing for graduate school this term. I am up late after waking up at about noon Saturday. I am studying and doing various household tasks like cleaning up after and recycling the Christmas tree. I am also doing some interesting computing.
I have a class on Monday after work. I need to wake up no earlier than 8:00 PM tonight for Monday's day of work and Monday's first class in the late afternoon and early evening. I want to reach a 24 hour day or a little less at 8:00 PM on Monday. Last week I was up at 4:00 PM the day before the first day of work for the week and this was not good because I reached a 24 hour day while still on the job. In fact, tonight it would be best to wake up very late at night but no later than 4:00 AM Monday morning. I may try to sleep 12 hours and should time 14 hours as 3:00 AM and 10 hours, as therefore 11:00 PM tonight. Meaning I need to sleep at about 1:00 PM this afternoon.
I need to take a book back to my old school library and it is now two days over due. The book concerns web technologies. I may connect this trip to the library with some early morning shopping. Then come home exhusted and sleep.
If your relative has schizophrenia and you are exhusted with the struggle I suggest contacting other parents of those with this illness. But perhaps you can read the struggles I face. My mother has been through a lot of struggle dealing with me you are not alone.
I am still helping M with her computer and she has agreed to buy a computer from me. I am now working on getting her connected to the internet. I will visit her on Saturday night to teach her some more about computers.
R, C, and J should be dropping by this evening. We will watch some TV and perhaps some Amnesty International Videos.
I only needed 6 hours sleep last night and am up at 5:00 AM this morning. I am just relaxing before going into work today. I will again work an extra half hour today to make up for some missing hours. I am now thinking this schedule will work fine for my classes which start this coming Monday.
I am getting used to the new work I have started in the new year. It is nice to get off work at 3:00 PM in the afternoon. So far I have had little problem getting up on time for work at 7:00 AM. I am home now and will be attending an evening meeting at one of my volunteer jobs.
I was exhusted working all day with a machine at work. I can't go into details. I got home at 3:40. I worked an extra half hour today to make up for some time I attended a union meeting. I saw our union president yesterday after work and had a brief chat. She is very friendly.
I took my meds at 5:40 today. I made some chilly from a can. My partner is having chilly too. I am enjoying some diet pepsi, some coffee, and some ice water.
I have not been volunteering as much but that should pick up now that I have a morning work shift. I will try tomorrow evening to attend a volunteer meeting for my law enforcement volunteering. I have missed about 6 months of meetings now. But I have continued to volunteer. I had a hard day at work today. It was nice to hear from D as she does community research and respects my activism and statistical skills.
I went into work at about 6:30 AM this morning. I got off work at 3:00 PM. I started work on a new project and am working 7:00 AM to 3:00 PM so I can attend evening courses. I was up at about 4:00 PM yesterday and must sleep now for tomorrow's work. I am very tired and took my meds at 5:45. My friend came by and took the old futon wood at 6:05 PM. My classes for the winter don't start for another week.
My dad and I video conferenced again this evening. We both agreed that buying the scooter might be too much debit. I am making some progress with debit but also overall still falling behind.
Using Apple's dot Mac I sent ecards to my former professors going back to about 1999. It is good to have warm human relations with these people who certainly helped me in recovery by allowing me an education.
I bought a pair of on sale trail shoes which are like leather sneakers with a vibram soul. I also got more socks. I actually have a coop share of the store that I bought these from. So it really is "my" store. I am also surfing ebay again. I also was web browsing computers for sale but I don't need another computer right now.
There were three reasons we are not eating at my partner's father's tonight. One he has a flu and so does her sister. That is the important reason. Two they are serving ham and we don't eat pork or ham. Her father did drop by here and brought us some rice, veggies, shrimp, and pie. Third reason we are not going over there is I am working at 7:00 AM tomorrow. I need to nap tonight so I wake up early enough. I slept today from 7:00 AM to 3:00 PM. I need another nap before working tomorrow.